Dealing With Negative People…
If you’ve been following my blog for awhile, you’ll know that it’s really important for me to amplify the voices of people I admire. Today I’m introducing a personal friend of mine – Sanja. Who is a speaker of many languages, avid reader of books, mother to a beautiful baby girl, positive thinker and has the most infectious laugh! I can’t help but smile when watching her YouTube channel, joy just radiates from her and I’m forever thankful for some of the things she’s shared with me.
Take it away Sanja…
My beautiful souls,
When Katie asked me to write an article for her blog, I was thrilled and so excited. What she didn’t know was that the night before, I got inspired by a certain story that I actually thought to myself how better it would be for me to write about it instead of recording a video. Synchronicities in life are amazing! After I got the freedom to write about anything that I wanted, I knew exactly what that was going to be…
Have you ever been hurt by someone else?
Have you ever cried because someone close to you said or did something wrong to you?
Do you want to know how never to get hurt again?
Do you want to know why those people did what they did?
If you do, stay tuned, because I’m going to share something really important.
I am a member of many Facebook groups, most of them related to positive thinking, subconscious mind, etc. In one of those groups, one girl asked for help. She wrote about how she feels like giving up, how she has no one to talk to except her cat. She said that she pushes people away and has hard time letting go of the past. She had to move away from her parent’s house because her mother started body-shaming her and laughing at her. She was feeling undeserving of love and she was thinking about giving up on life. All she wanted is to heal from the trauma, but didn’t know how…
I realise that a lot of people have gone through the feelings that she has. Maybe the situation was different for you, but your feelings still got hurt. And that’s where I want to help you being aware of what and why it happened.
My reply to her was:
“Parents do the best that they can, which doesn’t mean they’re doing it right. People that are in pain, people who are hurting, hurt other people. A happy person would never do that. Your parents, your environment, anyone that has ever given you even just a “negative” vibe, is battling their own battles and has nothing to do with you. People think it’s personal, people thing if my mum doesn’t love me, how can I love myself. But a person can’t give what they don’t have. A parent can’t give love that it doesn’t have inside. And again, it has nothing to do with the child. How were they brought up? Who hurts them? Why are they the way that they are? Once you can understand them (NOT by justifying their behavior), it’s easier than to realize that you had nothing to do with it. My belief is that we all deliberately choose to have this physical experience; that we choose our parents for lessons, for the journey.” – She claimed this helped her a lot, hopefully, it might help you too?
It might not be true, but that belief is serving me. Then I can’t blame anyone, it was my decision, no one else’s. I am the creator, I am in charge.
How can we learn what forgiveness feels like if we don’t have someone to hurt us? For now, until your perspective changes, avoid anything and anyone that lowers your vibration, as much as you can. I used to hang up on my mum a lot in the past if I would sense that I can’t control my vibration while she was saying some things. Decide to be happy. Do things that make your vibrations go higher? Even if that means taking a nap, watching comedies, watching funny videos on YouTube, babies laughing, pets…anything that is going to take you to that next step up. If you need to cry, cry…let it out, dust yourself off, and move on.
TAKE YOUR CONTROL BACK. You are beautiful, divine, powerful, amazing…you are pure love. Somewhere along the way you believed some person who told you that you are not. And the majority has been through that. No one taught us any better. Now you remind yourself you are here for a reason, remind yourself that this is an incredible experience and try to see it as such.
We have this amazing life. Maybe we don’t know the reason why. Maybe we don’t have to know it yet. Maybe the journey of figuring it out it’s what makes it fun and exciting?
Don’t blame yourself for anything because you’re not guilty of anything. That’s another lie they told us, that we have to feel guilty and ashamed. Everything is a part of a journey. You can’t learn to love yourself, YOU ARE LOVE. You just have to look inwards and see it. You don’t need to deserve love…again, you are love. We are all in this together. You are never alone. Separation is an illusion so that we can have this physical experience, but we are all connected. We are here for you. Our brains are made in a way to calculate the worst-case scenarios (which can make us feel stuck or alone, but we never are), and to tell us the worst things, just in case – to prepare us.
In hard times, I tell my brain:“Thank you, I know you think you are doing what you think it’s best for me, but at the moment, I’m choosing not to listen to you, because you are not right. “Meditation helped me more than anything. You can do EFT, affirmations Positive ones…people do affirmations every day, but they are usually low vibration ones…Try to focus and express gratitude towards the good things. That you have food, clean water, your sight, that you can hear, that you can breathe on your own, that you can walk, that you have arms, legs, that you are not lying in a hospital bed…Anything that you can think of – Huge fluffy pillows, bed, ice-cream, chocolate, bags, shoes. Have an attitude of gratitude. And that vibration will give you things that match it. Sending you lots of love and high vibrations.
I know there is someone out there who needs to read this, who needs to know this. I was one of them once. I know what it’s like to have a belief that we are victims, to believe that someone is doing something to us. I, luckily, ran into people who have reminded me that I am in charge of my life. As all of us are. We are the ones in control, we are the ones who have the power. We are the stars of our own films. We are at the center of our own universes. We decide how everything is going to play out. We live in this wonderful era of technology and the internet where we can find people who are more like us, where we can learn skills that we need, where we can research things on our own, and figure out that there are more ways than one of doing something. That is my mission in life. Reminding people that they can create anything that they want ~ because we are all creators. Giving them tools if they don’t know how to do it, and to spread joy, understanding, and happiness as much as possible.
I hope this article has served you (I know it has) and again, I want to thank Katie for giving me this amazing opportunity to spread love and support to all of you.
Sending you all high vibrations and lots of love!